The relationship between us isn’t good now. Or rather more of neutral, we seldom talk. Not exaggerating, but seriously, the words we spoke to each other is countable per year. Basically, we led our own life, not interfering into each other’s boundary. Sometimes, I ever forget about the fact that I actually have a brother.
The deepest impression of him were when we are both much younger.
He was the one who taught me the usage of computer and everything about Microsoft Office. He taught me how to play badminton and basketball. He encouraged me to learn cycling. He brought me downstairs to play everyday. He stood up for me when I was bullied by his friends. He shielded me from scoldings and beatings.
I was jealous of him then.
He would go around telling everyone, when his birthday is. Naturally, he received many presents on his birthday annually. I was reserved and shy, so my only presents are from my mom and my grandfather. Not only that, he was seldom caned by my mom. Reasons being he was good in his studies, straight aces appearing on his report card was not a rare scene. As for me, I was the known ‘dumb’ one, in the family.
I really feel inferior as compared to him. Relatives were concerned about him, praising about his achievement. Getting Scholarship or Bursary was so easy for him. I even remembered once, I was 9 then. I received an letter notifying about a Good Progress Award that I will be receiving. My parents, who don’t know much English, went down to the School’s General Office to ask about the content of the letter, bringing me along. I was thinking then, don’t they have any idea how I feel. What more is that they were shocked after knowing the content. I have never felt so inferior in my life.
This experience made me worked hard. I made it, getting Scholarship or Bursary for five consecutive years. But no matter how much I worked for, achievements of his always outshine mine in so many ways.
Recent years, our relationship got worst with those busy-bodies interfering. We aren’t concerned about who is going to a Junior College or who is going to a Polytechnic. We don’t think that going to a Junior College is worst than Polytechnic. But those adults, just went on and on. He blasted off, saying that I will be retained in year one and that I will not make it through. I was speechless then, or rather I have no more mood to carry on with that conversation.
Since then, the relationship was stained. I guess nothing can make things changed for the better. At least I know, I used to have a great brother.