Appreciated and Proud. Yet again..
People actually feel that I am very hard-working. A person who will always do tutorials and study for tests. I hate to tell them, but they do not know me yet. I am still procrastinating as usual, though I am still trying my best to control the urge. When I claimed that I only studied for the module on that day itself, I am stating a fact that I know, deep inside my heart. Not many believes me, they feel that making summarise notes or mind map is a form of studying or revision. To me, it is the reverse. Making notes or mind map is just a form of preparation towards studying or revising effectively and efficiently. I did not bother to explain to the people, because they will know what’s the truth when they truly know me. In the end, I am afraid to say that, these will not be the people that understands me. I chose to let the misunderstanding goes on because, it is not of any help for me to intervene their thinkings at this point. I continue to let them feel that I am a hypocrite.
When I really thought about it..
I feel like I am walking in a border-less desert. In the day, it is scorching hot that I am perspiring, I am totally drained off. The sandstorms are constant on the move, around me. I am desperate to see the oasis or even just accompany. Suddenly, I tripped and fell flat on the sand. My mouth is filled with the warm sand, it is not embarrassing but a sense of failure. I am at the verge of giving in. At night, the place is chilling cool. I continue to walk as I shivered. I imagine having a cape around me. When I tilt my head up, I see the starry sky. The stars seem to be rooting for me, be it day or night. I regain the energy to continue.
I was lonely then, because no one is there for me within the situation. But when I realise someone is always there for me, with genuine support and concern, I continue to walk my life journey with the confidence and might. I do not need the sandstorms to be totally wiped out, neither do I need the sun to set, I just need to realise, not everything needs to be explained.